Over Giving & Lack Of Self-Priority

It’s almost the end of the week. You are probably exhausted. Hopefully you don’t have a full schedule this weekend before you can even take a sigh of gratitude that the working week is over. I recently read this article by Chellie Campbell (thanks for letting me share it, Chellie) and it made me think of myself and many other people I know. I’m sure men do it too, but I know as a woman myself we are conditioned to be more nurturing, putting others before ourselves and being okay with that.

Especially mothers! Of course it is fine to be a good person and give out good energy, but firstly prioritising the self is essential because if you aren’t happy or feeling good about yourself honestly; you really can’t help anyone.

I subscribed to Chellie’s blog ages ago and it always inspire me to think about how and where I am heading in life,. She makes a good point that women are underpaid in our culture, and I think that isn’t because of inequality, it’s because women are less likely to value themselves or ask for more money, let alone think they are worth it. A great author who originally pioneered this theory which she called objectivism is Ayn Rand, she wrote some brilliant novels that are absolutely amazing on this topic.

So before you accept that invitation to where you don’t really want to go to or promise to help someone who perhaps doesn’t deserve it, have a read of this little wake-up call.

@Ilana Sowter Acupuncture, Murrays Bay, North Shore, Auckland, New Zealand 2018

Chellie Campbell, Financial Stress Reduction Speaker, Author, Coach

Is it a Miracle if you get a Massage??!

Do you dream of having more income, money in the bank, and time off to travel?
Are your closest friends your electronic devices?
Are other people raising your children?
Is it a miracle if you get a massage?
You’re not alone. So many women I meet love helping and serving others, but too often they leave their own good out of the equation, like this;
  • They don’t charge enough for their services
  • They give too much away for free
  • Money isn’t their primary objective anyway
  • They work too hard at too many tasks
  • They don’t take enough time off to nurture themselves
“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.”—Buddha
Women are also chronically undervalued and underpaid in our culture.
Psychologically, it takes enormous strength of character to face the fear of financial insecurity that a majority of women live with.
An article in the LA Times by Walter Hamilton in March of 2013 noted that “almost half of U.S women fear becoming bag ladies, even many of those earning six-figure salaries.”
Although 6 in 10 women reported that they were the primary breadwinners and 54% of them managed the household finances, 49% of women feared become a bag lady!*
*Note: if 6 in 10 women are the primary breadwinners, then it behooves men to fix the inequalities in pay, too!
The article went on to state that even though the women felt that they had “more earning power than ever before” and “handled major investment decisions”, they worried that “financial achievement alienates both men and other women.”
42% said “financially independent women intimidate men and run the risk of ending up alone.”
31% said “those women are hard to relate to and don’t have many friends.”
Yikes. Talk about a “Catch-22”! If you’re not financially successful, you’ll end up homeless on the street, and if you are, no one will like you?!
Somehow, we have to navigate through these conflicts to find both financial and personal success in the life we want to lead.
After all, what good is having a lot of money if you can’t take time off to enjoy it?
None of us want to have great internet relationships but no time for in-person relationships with the ones we love the most—our families and best friends. And who wants to miss seeing the world, enjoying a scrumptious dinner at the Jules Verne in the Eiffel Tower, skiing in Vail, sailing in San Francisco Bay, birding in Cancun, eating a $25 ice cream cone in Rome, winning a poker tournament on a Card Player Cruise to the Caribbean, or reading a zillion books just for the pleasure of it?
I never traveled at all until I noticed I was wishing I had. Now I’ve had all the adventures listed above because I put them on my agenda—and then on my calendar—for the past 30 years. And you can, too—I’ll show you how to do it in just 8 weeks.
When I read that 29% of Americans died before reaching age 65, and then after retiring at age 65, 33% of them were dead within two years, I decided I wasn’t going to wait until I retired to have a great life.
I scaled my own speaking/writing/workshop career to include large amounts of time off to play. I don’t overbook. I want to see a lot of white space in my calendar every week because I learned that don’t have creative ideas in the middle of a too-busy appointment calendar and a too-full To Do List. I have creative ideas when I’m hiking, napping, driving, meditating, or getting a massage—when there’s peace and quiet and time to think strategically.
Would you like more money – how much?
More clients- how many?
More time off to enjoy life – when?
How about NOW?
For more than 25 years, I have been helping small business owners MAKE HUGE LEAPS IN THEIR INCOME and enjoy fabulous success and prosperity.